Don't Wink At Me
Have an inappropriate online dating story? I want to hear it. Send your tale to dontwinkblog[at]gmail.com.
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When creating your online profile, your photo choice is of the utmost importance. Things you should aim to accomplish with said photo include, but are not limited to:
1. Showing potential mates what your face looks like (a current shot, not from a few years ago when you had a tan/weighed 20 pounds less)
2. A clothed (yes, that means wearing both a shirt and pants. A dress is acceptable if you are a female), full body shot that gives potential mates an idea of what your body looks like
3. Maybe a photo that shows you doing something you love– traveling, hiking, cooking dinner… something respectable.
I know some of us learn better by example. Here is an example of a single, Miami man who has it all wrong.
First of all, he’s completely opted out of the standard face shot for this:
Where do I even start?
Exhibit A: Your room is filthy. And apparently belongs to a woman. Pink sheets, perfume bottles, a pink camera. If you’re going to take a photo of yourself in the mirror, make sure your surroundings are at least tidy. Because at this point, all potential mates know is that you’re extremely messy, can’t hang a painting straight and…
Exhibit B: …are a male stripper. For some reason, many men who venture into the world of online love have yet to learn that women DO NOT respond well to lots of skin in photos. We are not like men in that way. At all. This makes you look like a creep and only a creep.
Exhibit C: What’s with the washer and dryer all boxed up in the corner? I guess if you’re wearing a thong all the time, the majority of your warshing can be done in the bathroom sink with a splash of Woolite. Speaking of bathrooms….
Exhibit D: DO NOT, under any circumstances, take a photo of yourself in the bathroom with your camera (or worse, cell phone). The quality is junk and you always end up looking like a cocky douchebag (even if you’re not). Additionally, it makes a gal wonder, Does he not have friends? Can’t someone help him? And why is your bathroom so gross?!
Props to our friend Mango here who can teach us all a lesson. Banana hammocks should stay on the beach… in Europe. Not as an advertisement to Amerka that you’re single and ready for love.
